Kenneth Copeland Turns Into Monster And Scares People

In a church service last Sunday, Tv preacher Kenneth Copeland turned into what churchgoers described as a demon from Hell. According to eyewitness Bob Smith, the incident occurred when Mr Copeland was laying hands on and trying to heal a man with herpes. "It was pretty scarey Mr Smith said. I was here with my 86 year old wheelchair bound mother. She was waiting to get healed and get out of her chair, but instead she got so scared she shit her pants. Let me tell you, it sure stunk up the whole place real good". According to several other witnesses there, at least 40-50 people got up out of fear and began heading for the doors. At this point some very large men dressed in black suits began standing in front of the doors to block all escape. The witnesses claimed these men each had a baseball bat in one hand, and a collection plate in the other. This is when Kenneth Copeland spoke to the church and told them that God was punishing him because the people of the church haven't been giving enough love offerings. He also claimed that God told him that he would heal him if the generous people of the church would open their wallets and each give a minimum of a $100 love offering so that God may heal him. Its unclear how many in the church then gave a love offering, but Mr Copeland seems to have returned back to normal and has not turned into a monster since.